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Melanie Lentz

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Do It Yourself: Measure Twice, Cut Once (and other tools for life)

April 13, 2020

In my recent attempts at home improvement, I have discovered the wonders of spackle and the power that lies in a tube of caulk loaded in a caulking gun. Those items can mask a lot of Do It Yourself (DIY) fails like that base board corner cut that wasn’t quite right or that old drafty window in need of sealing. Just fill it all in with spackle and caulk. No one but an exceptionally trained eye will know the difference in the end.

 

(Insert me smugly blowing smoke off of the tip of the caulking gun) 

 

Spackle and caulk are like the Band-Aids of home improvement to me. They’re quick coverups for minor “boo boos” and icky, inexperiened cuts. They’re a staple in my closet like flour and sugar in a pantry. 

 

I bought a small house last summer, and I’ve complained about it a lot. As a buyer, a lot was “hidden” or conveniently excluded from disclosures and overlooked during inspections. It wasn’t the first house I’ve purchased in my lifetime, so I’ve been through this process before. But I’m not an expert at buying houses. Some problems are easy to spot, but there are others I just don’t know to look for. Plus, buying a house in California versus buying a house in the Midwest is very different. I’ve learned a lot (the hard way) with the purchase of this house.

 

In a nutshell, my house had big issues, and it wasn’t until I started scrubbing away the grime (and dry heaving occasionally) that these issues began to surface. Not one single appliance was in “good working order” like I was told. The dryer almost caught on fire the first time it was turned on. The kitchen cabinets were full of mold. They’d just placed loose boards in the cabinets to make them look clean. Underneath was rotted and decayed. Unusable. Unsalvageable. 

 

The house was not ready for human habitation for almost two months. What was thought to be a really dirty house in need of mostly cosmetic updates turned into a severely neglected house full of shoddy DIY repairs requiring extensive and expensive corrections… and there were critters (insert more dry heaving).

 

I had my work cut out for me. I could do a lot of the cleanup on my own. I mowed through the overgrown yard, picked up bags upon bags of trash, YouTubed my way through tiling the bathroom, yanked up the old carpet and installed wood plank flooring. My family came over and had a “painting party” to cover the brown walls with crisp white paint. Dad patiently helped with the leaky roof, garage door, electrical issues, etc.

 

After some elbow grease, I was able to move in and complete the other projects little by little.

 

I replaced a simple light fixture with a pull chain and knew enough to know the hot pink duct tape the previous owners substituted for electrical tape wasn’t ideal. I felt proud as I matched the black wires with the black wires, the white with the white, secured the ground, and wrapped it with a fresh roll of black electrical tape. The room filled with light when I turned the power back on and pulled the string. 

 

I’m getting the hang of this, I thought to myself.

 

Those little projects have been the hardest for me, though. Why? Because I think they’re little projects I can do myself. They’re not those obvious challenges that require the professionals like add-ons or structural repairs. But the little projects take so much longer by myself because I don’t know what I’m doing. I have had to learn as I go.

 

Let’s get real. Friends call me “handy” because my dad has taught me a lot about fixing things and patiently talked me through repairs via FaceTime. What they don’t know is that I screw up a lot before I get things right around the house. I forgot to turn off the water before I tried to replace the fill valve in the toilet (went through a lot of towels to clean that mess up).

 

I have avoided my laundry room for many months now. Of all the rooms in the house, this one was the one I didn’t want to tackle. There were pipes everywhere and ugly nails poking out. The concrete floor was painted at one point (years ago I would guess), and the dark red paint coming out from underneath the latest coat of peeling paint made the floor look like someone had recently bled out. No one had cleaned behind the water heater or furnace in at least a decade. By the time I’d finished most of the other projects around the inside of the house, I couldn’t avoid addressing the yucky laundry room.

 

It needed a good cleaning, paint, and flooring at a minimum. Some baseboards and trim would also help.

 

Over the last few weeks, I’ve tackled the laundry room.

 

And here’s my takeaway from that project: Sometimes I need to be accepting of help, even if the project seems manageable on my own on the surface.

 

I struggle with feeling guilty for inconveniencing anyone. I don’t want to be a bother. I want to have it together and be able to handle my own problems. I will inconvenience myself to avoid causing a hassle to another person nine times out of ten.

 

Some good friends kindly offered to help me put flooring in the laundry room recently. They offered out of the goodness of their hearts. They even met me at Home Depot to find the right kind of flooring and brought another friend to the installation in case we needed another set of wiser eyes.

 

I was overwhelmed with their kindness. Honestly, I was a little embarrassed to have other people see that disgusting laundry room.

 

This isn’t how I live, I wanted to say. Please don’t judge me by the state of this room. This whole place is a work in progress.

 

As usual, a simple flooring installation revealed another issue, a plumbing one to be precise. That’s the nature of this house. No project goes as smoothly as it should. Thankfully, that repair could be fixed by the wiser eyes assisting me. If I’d been doing this by myself, I would not have known what to do (and I’d have been without water until I could get someone there to help me).

 

My friends had the tools and knowledge to get me through a home update, and now my laundry room is well on its way to looking like a clean freak resides in the house.

 

(The timing was great, too. Unless you’ve been living under a rock, hanging out with people in person is discouraged for the time being due to COVID-19. It was good that we did it when we did.)

 

I’m a fixer upper just like my house. I’ll always need updates and repairs. Growth never goes as smoothly as I planned. But like the house, the end results look a lot more polished with the right tools. I can do some things right the first time by being more calculated and receptive to sound guidance like “measure twice, cut once” and wise words like these. And best of all, the best tools and resources are often found in the willing and kind people around me who don’t think helping others is an inconvenience.

 

Someone WILL have the “tools” and experience when I don’t. I’ve been reminded to welcome those who roll up their sleeves and ask how they can help when I need help with a remodel. They’re the good ones. Thank you!

Embracing the typos till next Monday-ish,

Mel

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The Bloggy Blog

The place for occasional and random thoughts and ramblings. Check the archives below for some old bad blogs.


Older Stuff

Featured
The MySpace Series: Part One
March 15, 2021
The MySpace Series: Part One
March 15, 2021

Last week, I was searching for an email to prepare for a podcast interview. The keyword search produced a handful of emails, one of which had the subject line “myspace blog posts” and myself as the sender/recipient.

Apparently, a few years back (or eleven), I copied all of my old MySpace blogs from college into an email (probably before I deleted everything on MySpace). I don’t remember sending this email, nor do I remember writing any of the posts.

As I read through them, I realized I’ve matured a lot since then, but I also realized I might need to revisit some of the “wisdom” my young adult mind was spouting on MySpace.

I guess I’ve been blogging badly longer than I thought.

Read more →
March 15, 2021
The Way Up
March 8, 2021
The Way Up
March 8, 2021

Well, I’ve had to make some more big changes in my life. For the last month and a half, I’ve been burning the midnight oil, stuck between finishing up the old and getting started with the new. For the first time in a long time, I fell behind on the things that matter to me a lot, and it’s not like me to let that happen. The Type-A in me was (and still is) horrified.

Read more →
March 8, 2021
The Little Things
January 11, 2021
The Little Things
January 11, 2021

Last week was quite a week, wasn’t it? I found myself saying aloud, “What is happening?”

What is happening? A lot, to say the least, and enough to leave anyone in a state of sadness and despair. What a mess. An important, troubling mess that needs sorting and fixing. Anyone on all sides of the table can probably agree with that.

I’ve been thinking a lot about what’s to come, both for me and for the country. I think I, like many, secretly hoped for clarity and change as the New Year rolled around. A clear path to the future.

When I know I need to make a change, I delay the decisions and hope for a “sign” that it’s the correct one before I make it. I’m sure many can relate to that. Big decisions are scary. Change is scary. But risk is necessary sometimes. Like I’ve been saying for a long time, I can’t move forward without getting uncomfortable.

But a sign would be nice, sometimes.

I suppose clarity and answers are often present if we stop and listen long enough to see them. There’s something to be learned everywhere, even if it’s in the little things.

That’s what I want to share today… a few little things.

Read more →
January 11, 2021
Notes to Self
December 28, 2020
Notes to Self
December 28, 2020

Last week I went through my Book Box, a big decorative box I used to store book drafts and ideas when I was writing Agent Innocent. Talk about a trip down memory lane. Wow. Those early book drafts were rough, not to mention very angry and depressing.

I was happy to send most of the contents of the box to the shredder.

I had forgotten, however, about some of the random contents I’d tucked away in there.

Sprinkled throughout the Book Box were post-it notes with quotes in my loopy cursive, torn pieces of paper with scribbled quotes from movies or television shows, and torn pages from magazines with quotes on them.

As I read these, I smiled, picturing myself in my little one-bedroom West LA apartment scribbling quotes and notes in the wee hours of the morning. The night owl in me was alive and well those days.

In my final Bad Blog of 2020, I’m going to go back to those late-night notes and share a few of them here. I remember the circumstances and reasons for some of them. Others I don’t. Either way, it was good for me to revisit them, and I hope some of them are encouraging to you as well.

Here they are!

Read more →
December 28, 2020
12,000 Steps
December 14, 2020
12,000 Steps
December 14, 2020

“Why are we like this?” Ah, we’ve asked this question many times.

I thought about the days of old, the ones before Apple Watches and activity trackers came into my life. I thought of the college days when my pink flip phone took crappy pictures and I had to hit the 7 button four times to type an S when sending a text. I trained for half and full marathons like this and had no idea what my pace was during these long runs. I just made a route ahead of time so I knew I’d gone the distance and didn’t worry so much about pace. It was about the experience, not the inner competition with a watch.

Read more →
December 14, 2020
Bad Day
December 8, 2020
Bad Day
December 8, 2020

When I have a bad or cranky day, I usually tell myself to “try again tomorrow” because a bad day does not have to be a bad week or a bad life. A phrase from Anne of Green Gables comes to mind. “Tomorrow is always fresh with no mistakes in it (yet).”

My family has a rule. If we are cranky, we need to “announce” it. It’s as simple as saying, “I’m cranky today, FYI.” If you act like an idiot to family, then someone is probably going to ask, “What’s your problem? Did you forget to announce today?”

Read more →
December 8, 2020
Winning
November 30, 2020
Winning
November 30, 2020

I want those people to know I’m not a joke, that I’ve won. God, I feel that.

Read more →
November 30, 2020
Throwing Stones
November 23, 2020
Throwing Stones
November 23, 2020

As a kid, I liked to collect pretty rocks. The shinier the better. The more misshapen the better. Sometimes I’d even find a dull looking rock and crack it in half with a hammer to see if the inside was shiny. I’d be delighted if the insides sparkled.

Today I still have pretty rocks, and, to some, random rocks around my house might look a little peculiar. But, then again, I’ve never claimed to be “normal” so perhaps visitors chalk it up to my eclectic taste in décor.

I came by some of these stones while living in West Los Angeles. Others were picked up after I moved to the Midwest.

The new rocks are healing stones.

(Now relax, family and friends. I have not taken to worshipping inanimate objects and I’m not delving into devil worship.)

Read more →
November 23, 2020
Character and Characters
November 16, 2020
Character and Characters
November 16, 2020

I’ve decided to write a novel. Well, perhaps I should rephrase. I’ve had a trilogy “planned” for about three years now. I just haven’t done anything about it. I recently figured out why that might be the case.

I’ve had this grand plan to write an exciting story with the “usual” Secret Service assassination (or assassination attempt), complete with a complex execution plan and a hyper-observant batch of agents saving the day at the very last millisecond. Also, it wouldn’t be complete if the first book didn’t end on an extreme cliffhanger where someone has died and we won’t know who until the second book.

I had a general outline of the story for each book. I just needed to write it.

But I didn’t write it.

Every time I sat down to write the story, I failed.

Read more →
November 16, 2020
September 12, 2001
November 9, 2020
September 12, 2001
November 9, 2020

This election was the first time I voted at an actual polling location. Since election days were usually travel days for me in the Secret Service, I was always an absentee voter. This time, I participated in early voting at a local shopping mall. I was excited as I stood in line. It felt like my first time voting. I sat in the little booth smiling like a little kid as I filled in my bubbles, smirking at the fact that Kanye West was actually an option on the ballot. I thought it was joke when others mentioned it. Guess not. I grinned from ear to ear as the lady stamped my ballot and handed me the “I Voted” sticker. #American

“I don’t want to talk about the election. I stay away from political topics.”

This is usually my answer when people ask me about politics, and, specifically, this election. I think this country has morphed into a place where those conversations are unlikely to remain civil, especially if they occur on the Internet where anyone and everyone behind a keyboard can become a rude, sniveling pile of hate to one another.

Read more →
November 9, 2020